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For a moment there, I was Number 1. I never thought I could be first in anything non-specific on Google. But it happened. This blog, this blog you are currently reading, was the Number 1 entry on one glorious afternoon for the Google search hippo enemy. I am back to the crappy-assed number 2 entry now. Some zoo in Hawaii seems to have beaten me out as the Number 1 Hippo Enemy. Some zoo gets the Number 1 spot with information about how hippos are really their own worst enemies in zoo enclosures. I ask you when is hippo on hippo crime even information?
I have never been Number 1 for any 2 word Google search before. Not even my name produces a Number 1 entry for a Google search. I was the happiest person known to man yesterday, but reality soon made its presence known. Well, except for that whole Mother Nature screwing with my sinuses thing.
I am no longer the top of the mountain looking down. I am again climbing, striving to be something greater. My brief glimpse of Internet fame left me wanting more. Page 1 of the Google searches for ignorant Alabamians, turtle rave, “making fun of someone,” and Little Debbie oatmeal cream pie just doesn’t seem to feel as nice as being the Number 1 hippo enemy.
Greatness is truly fleeting. Sure I am Number 1 and 1.5 for the search hippo no natural enemy, but that seems to be splitting hairs for a search. Too many hedges leading back to my post. Now, Hippo Enemy, that was something great! 2 fairly common words strung together culminating in my rant against hippo-kind!
To recap:
Who’s Number 1?
The Honolulu Zoo’s Hippo Page
Smug little bastards! I bet they are just living it up right now in their tropical paradise weather and Number 1 hippo enemy status
I hate them with the fire of a thousand suns
But I would love to visit their zoo, it looks nice
My breath is minty fresh
I go to the chiropractor tomorrow
Maybe it will get rid of some of my headaches
I have never been Number 1 for any 2 word Google search before. Not even my name produces a Number 1 entry for a Google search. I was the happiest person known to man yesterday, but reality soon made its presence known. Well, except for that whole Mother Nature screwing with my sinuses thing.
I am no longer the top of the mountain looking down. I am again climbing, striving to be something greater. My brief glimpse of Internet fame left me wanting more. Page 1 of the Google searches for ignorant Alabamians, turtle rave, “making fun of someone,” and Little Debbie oatmeal cream pie just doesn’t seem to feel as nice as being the Number 1 hippo enemy.
Greatness is truly fleeting. Sure I am Number 1 and 1.5 for the search hippo no natural enemy, but that seems to be splitting hairs for a search. Too many hedges leading back to my post. Now, Hippo Enemy, that was something great! 2 fairly common words strung together culminating in my rant against hippo-kind!
To recap:
Who’s Number 1?
The Honolulu Zoo’s Hippo Page
Smug little bastards! I bet they are just living it up right now in their tropical paradise weather and Number 1 hippo enemy status
I hate them with the fire of a thousand suns
But I would love to visit their zoo, it looks nice
My breath is minty fresh
I go to the chiropractor tomorrow
Maybe it will get rid of some of my headaches
Labels: Hippo
7 Comments:
i bet the zoo people aren't as happy as you may think right. with the rain they have been having, the hippos may have been washed out to sea. so then their web page would ready something like this, the killer whale has now been added to the list of enemies to the hippo.
kim:
So, you are saying that I am no longer the only natural enemy of the hippo? Now I am really sad.
Congratulations, I guess.......
Am I the only one who's worried about you?
hope the chiropractor can help with your headaches.
not so sure i'd trust one to treat me, but...some people do. good luck.
well, cheer up. Not all is lost. At least you can bask in the glow of days of glory past
Mom, I too am worried, but I try to worry quietly in the corner without saying much. I figure if I don't call attention to the bizarre ideas that come out of SRH's mind, they might go away...
Mom and Wifey:
You guys don't need to worry. The ones that need to worry are the hippos... and the Yetis. Damn Yetis!
Kimmyk:
I do not think conventional medical treatment will really be able to help at the moment. I do not think that this is a medicatable issue. Hopefully the Chiropracty will work.
Jude:
Unfortunately, I can only bask in the afternoon of glories past.
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