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Unlike most kids who seem to question answers to their questions with their 3 year old favorite question of “Why?”
Hypothetical yet Entirely Plausible Example
Time to go to bed
Why?
Because you need your sleep for tomorrow.
Why?
Because without sleep you will have no energy to do any fun playing tomorrow.
Why?
Because sleep re-enrgizes you.
Why?
Because your body only has a limited amount of energy.
Why?
Sweet Mother of God and All that is Holy, I will kill you if you keep asking “why?”
Why?
Because it is absolutely infuriating!
Why?
… you are dead and don’t even know it yet…
We in the happy SRH household get “Wha happen’d?” Sometimes the “’d” is silent. That is just how Little Man rolls. Sometimes when he is in a hurry it gets contracted even further ‘til it becomes something like “Wh’happun?” Little Man does not necessarily want to understand how things work, he wants a running play by play with running commentary. He will be playing and one of his myriad of trains will fall of the tracks to the train table surface and Little Man will ask, “Wha happen’d?” Little Man and I will be rolling a ball back and forth giggling like jibbering idiots, the ball will go under the TV cabinet and he will confusedly ask, “Wh’happen?”
What I think Little Man wants is:
For those of you just tuning in from the basketball game, it seems that Thomas the train is really building up a head of steam on Little Man’s outside track on the train table in the SRH Tyson Chicken Tenders Memorial Coliseum and Dining Room.
That’s right, Frank. An interesting note, while Little Man really likes making James the red engine a long train, Thomas is usually reserved for just his 2 typical passenger cars. The outside track on the table is perfect for building up speed.
Well, Pete, it looks as if Thomas is being set aside to get Percy into the action with his tanker cars.
Now that Percy is “out of the way” Thomas has a clear shot over the “Arched Viaduct” and into the turn-table.
Oh,MY! It looks as if Thomas has taken a tumble.
Little Man just got too much of a push on Thomas for the little wooden train to be able to handle the curved track at the top of the incline, and straight over the edge he went. This is a typical occurrence for Little Man’s usually over-zealous running of the trains. 1 out of every 4 circuits around the table ends up with some kinds of de-railing mishap.
That’s right, Pete, but this isn’t going to stop Little Man from playing trains.
Ooh, it looks like the tyrannical 3 year old is heading to the fridge for some “Orange Rice.”
The “Orange Rice” is actually a modified recipe from the Betty Crocker One-Dish Meals Cookbook. It started out as the Beef and Wild Rice Casserole and has been modified to meet Little Man’s allergen requirements…
To recap:
I am sure we will be venturing into the "Valley of 'Why?'" but we have not gotten there yet
T Minus 3 days until the vacation
Wifey and I are not willing to do play-by-play and color commentary
We just aren't
We have other things to do
No really
We have to cook, clean, do laundry
Sometimes kids cannot always get everything they want
I am definitely not going to hire anyone to do play-by-play or color
Get off my back already!
Wha Happen'd?
Hypothetical yet Entirely Plausible Example
Time to go to bed
Why?
Because you need your sleep for tomorrow.
Why?
Because without sleep you will have no energy to do any fun playing tomorrow.
Why?
Because sleep re-enrgizes you.
Why?
Because your body only has a limited amount of energy.
Why?
Sweet Mother of God and All that is Holy, I will kill you if you keep asking “why?”
Why?
Because it is absolutely infuriating!
Why?
… you are dead and don’t even know it yet…
We in the happy SRH household get “Wha happen’d?” Sometimes the “’d” is silent. That is just how Little Man rolls. Sometimes when he is in a hurry it gets contracted even further ‘til it becomes something like “Wh’happun?” Little Man does not necessarily want to understand how things work, he wants a running play by play with running commentary. He will be playing and one of his myriad of trains will fall of the tracks to the train table surface and Little Man will ask, “Wha happen’d?” Little Man and I will be rolling a ball back and forth giggling like jibbering idiots, the ball will go under the TV cabinet and he will confusedly ask, “Wh’happen?”
What I think Little Man wants is:
For those of you just tuning in from the basketball game, it seems that Thomas the train is really building up a head of steam on Little Man’s outside track on the train table in the SRH Tyson Chicken Tenders Memorial Coliseum and Dining Room.
That’s right, Frank. An interesting note, while Little Man really likes making James the red engine a long train, Thomas is usually reserved for just his 2 typical passenger cars. The outside track on the table is perfect for building up speed.
Well, Pete, it looks as if Thomas is being set aside to get Percy into the action with his tanker cars.
Now that Percy is “out of the way” Thomas has a clear shot over the “Arched Viaduct” and into the turn-table.
Oh,MY! It looks as if Thomas has taken a tumble.
Little Man just got too much of a push on Thomas for the little wooden train to be able to handle the curved track at the top of the incline, and straight over the edge he went. This is a typical occurrence for Little Man’s usually over-zealous running of the trains. 1 out of every 4 circuits around the table ends up with some kinds of de-railing mishap.
That’s right, Pete, but this isn’t going to stop Little Man from playing trains.
Ooh, it looks like the tyrannical 3 year old is heading to the fridge for some “Orange Rice.”
The “Orange Rice” is actually a modified recipe from the Betty Crocker One-Dish Meals Cookbook. It started out as the Beef and Wild Rice Casserole and has been modified to meet Little Man’s allergen requirements…
To recap:
I am sure we will be venturing into the "Valley of 'Why?'" but we have not gotten there yet
T Minus 3 days until the vacation
Wifey and I are not willing to do play-by-play and color commentary
We just aren't
We have other things to do
No really
We have to cook, clean, do laundry
Sometimes kids cannot always get everything they want
I am definitely not going to hire anyone to do play-by-play or color
Get off my back already!
Wha Happen'd?
Labels: Little Man
4 Comments:
okay, this is maybe the funniest blog you have ever posted. i will even forgive your rude dismissal of my play invite last week only for making me laugh when i am feeling pissy. can you come over and run commentary for my ladies? they don't need it, but it may help r understand what i am up against all day when she is "working" (really just playing boggle on/against her computer). okay, happy happy vacation.
anon:
Thank you for the kind compliment. I am always happy when I can break through a pissy mood. I am not good at play-by-play and I do not have the research capabilities to do color commentary well. You will need to find someone else.
Sometimes I just can't wait for 21-month-old H to gain the language skills for a "Why?" litany. Then I read posts like this. Or I hear a father in the handicapped stall at Barnes & Noble trying to help his pre-verbal child do his business, all while being driven completely batguano insane by the nonstop questions of his four-year-old. (It must have been crowded in there.)
And then I think maybe it's okay for H to be a lower-case 'h' a little longer.
B:
So far we have dodged the "Why" bullet... it is only a matter of time. Pre-school starts soon. I am sure the "why's" will as well. Thanks for stopping by.
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