Resolutions

The topic at work today is “What are your New Year’s resolutions.” The other topic is “I am so glad that I don’t have to write checks anymore, because I would get the year wrong each time.” But we aren’t talking about the second topic, because it is just plain silly.

Resolutions tend to be a bit like self fulfilling broken prophecies. I think this is due to how people frame the resolutions. People tend to make them way too particular and typically unattainable. Therefore I will turn the old blogarooney into a self help styled blog today to assist with creating reasonable resolutions.

Number 1: Be vague. It is much easier to “be more healthy” than it is to “lower my cholesterol by 50 points.” Vague is the way to go because it is harder to miss a vague target. You only lower the cholesterol by 45 points… you broke the specific resolution, but the vague one is a winna!

Number 2: Do not associate a timeframe to the resolution. Give yourself the entire year, these are year long resolutions anyway. “I will lose 25 lbs by the summer so I will look good at the beach.” That is a 6 month resolution which means you need to lose 5 lbs every month during the dreary winter months filled with slothful heavy foods. Good luck. How about you lose the 25 over the course of 12 months? Or better yet, make the resolution “to look better naked.” 25 pounds? Highly unlikely. “Better looking nekkid?” Attainable.

Number 3: Stay away from addictions. Smoking, alcohol, heroine, gambling, World of Warcraft, porn (this is the Interweb after all), lip-balm, etc… these resolutions are destined to be broken… and fast. Fighting addictions is not something that should be reduced to a “resolution.” Addictions take lifestyle change, and lifestyle change does not happen because the calendar year went up by 1.

There you go! Three hints to make attainable New Year’s resolutions.

What are SRH’s New Year’s resolutions? You ask. Well, good reader, I don’t make resolutions. They are stupid.

To recap:
Still late posting today
But not sooooo late
Tomorrow is Digital Thursday
Here’s a hint: “OOkla has a friend”
Not sure what is going on for dinner tonight
I hope it involves my car starting
I drove Wifey’s car today and stranded her at the house
I am good like that
16° F (-8.889° C) seemed a bit too cold for my crappy battery
Hopefully 25° F (-3.889° C) won’t be
I knew I should have driven it around yesterday